The difference a year makes.

In November 2009 Justin and I were just recovering from the miscarriage and I was especially vulnerable. It tore my heart out just to walk by the baby aisle at Target. Then one day I had to buy something for a friend of mine's son's first birthday. We went shopping even though I never found something for her son I just had to buy this cute green sleeper with little football-playing dinosaurs.

At the time I thought I would forever have an empty uterus and would be haunted by this empty piece of clothing, but I didn't care. Apparently self torture was my way of coping.

Now, 14 months later, that sleeper is not so empty. My amazing, beautiful, perfect baby girl finally fills it out. It's so amazing the difference a year makes.

October 15th

is a day to promote support, education and awareness for those who are suffering or may know someone who has suffered a miscarriage, an ectopic pregnancy, a still birth, or the loss of an infant.

Today I lit a candle in our home to honor the baby we lost to miscarriage last year. While if we had not lost that baby, we would not have Avery, that doesn't mean we didn't and don't love that baby too.

I hate that miscarriage is such a taboo subject. It deserves recognition so that women going through it don't feel alone. It's a sad fact that 1 in 4 are touched by pregnancy or infant loss.

Aside from Avery the one other bright spot that has come out of this journey has been the amazing friends I have found who have and are going through the same thing.